Touch
by Bullshifters
Summary: She feels that love is at first touch, and meets an unlikely match when her dreams come true for the first time since He died. And it's not really who she's been hoping for. Oneshot, R&R


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><p>I leapt back as if I had been singed by his touch.<p>

His touch. It rolled off my tongue like the most amazing tasting sweet in the world (that didn't give you unnecessary carbs or fats I mean) Touch says it all, that delicate brushing that makes your nerves go aflame. A touch can be so sudden it hurts for hours, or as light as a mouse's whisper, but it makes you twitch irritably. There are touches with fingers, eyelashes, hands, feet, face, neck, and tongue. In side the trousers and the tiniest hairs on your scalp. A touch can make you fall in love. But I was already in love, with someone who had already touched me

(But does it matter. He's dead?)

And the person in front of me, staring at me exasperatedly…

(And the one I love I have to wait to change)

He says my power's shit it doesn't work on him.

(And even though my heart has been given away at 'first touch', the person I see everyday still hasn't touched me yet without wanting to piss on my tits)

He's disappointed while I am thrilled.

(But am I really, do I want it to be the person who wants to piss on my tits.)

Should I say something, or touch him again.

(But the person I really want to touch again is dead, but dead in the future)

He blinks and squints confusedly as I try not to cry.

(And I'm so sick of this weird bullshit)

Cry with happiness.

(Cry it wasn't him)

Cry I could relate to someone while touching him

(Cry that he wouldn't understand)

Cry that everything was finally falling together

(And apart)

Just like he said it would

(Just like he will say it will)

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><p>Friday night, and I walk to the club.<p>

They're all there and we dance.

I'm wearing long sleeves. So people can't touch me accidentally

(Or see the scars)

And I lurch forward and I stop, afraid, afraid no one can save me this time as I yet feel again the disappointment of skin on skin. I waited to feel the bulge against my hip emanating from below they're waist, to hear them announce they're attraction and they're hard grip, feeling my virgin body.

(Or not so much)

But this time, nothing happens.

And I try not to freak, as I turn and see Simon.

No wait, Nathan?

Simon is staring on confused, envious, angered slightly. Nathan, slightly more than tipsy, pick up my wrist high into the intoxicated banging air, flashing lights and pounding music, shakes it a little bit as if they're was a button or something and lets it drop with a slap at my thigh.

'That's rubbish' He says in his thick Irish accent, taking a swig of beer, 'I thought something more exciting was going to happen. Your worse than dear beautiful Ollie.' I try to stop the gag that almost holds me still, and I keep it back. I can touch someone, and it's Nathan of all people. The immortal prick…

'What's tha?' Kelly stumbles over, in the same state as Nathan (as per usual) and glances back and forth from me Nathan and Simon.

'You can touch her?' She says, almost enviously, as I see her hand creep slowly near Nathan's, as if to claim his touch as her own. His skin is soft.

Soft and non-hairy and clear… And it's what I've been asking for.

But she must be more specific in her dreams next time, cause when she wishes that, 'Please could anyone touch me', she meant, 'Please may Simon hold me.'

Nathan flinches as Kelly touches him, and he shudders when a man bumps into him. He starts to go white.

'I feel weird'

And I hope I haven't done anything wrong.

(Though is it really wrong if it isn't intentional)

And she watches him fall and be led outside, juddering at every twitch.

Because he's immortal, he takes in what makes him stronger. Kill him, he'll give you life. Touch him, and he'll give you heaven. And in a weird way Nathan is a giver, as she stands in the middle of the bumping club, everyone pushing in, blackening her vision, only lightened by a streak of disco light. And I come to the conclusion, that he is a twat, but my only hope.

And yet I seem to be the opposite. Give me your touch, and I'll take your innocence. Give me your trust and I'll probably break it. And again I come to another conclusion as the club starts to shut down, and I'm still in the exact same spot, not moving, ignoring everyone-

(But I can't see the others anywhere and she hasn't for hours)

-and I realises if Nathan takes in everything, what if he has taken in my touch. What if I've hurt him? And I don't want to hurt anyone.

(Though I can't do much to stop myself)

And I hope that I haven't spread my disease. I go outside and I find no one. I feel betrayed. So I go to the place where my mind beckons me. I go to the community centre, and I hope he is there. I need to apologise for taken the satanic touch that was not mine to take.

(All I want is a hug)

And when I arrive and ascend the stairs to where I see his sleeping figure.

(Kelly hovers in the corner, and gives me a smile, and I see the way she looks at him, and I apologise God for stealing another thing that isn't mine)

And I stir the Irish boy awake and he stares at me with deep green eyes.

And he knows.

He knows how I feel, even if he felt it for only a brief second back at the club.

(And he's cute, how couldn't I have seen it before?)

And I lean in.

And I steal kiss that was not mine to take.

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><p><strong>Slight AlishaNathan :D**

**And Simon/Alisha I guess too :) Sorry its so short! xx**


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